I’m going to to ahead and confess to some wetsuit avoidance. I find wetsuits intimidating for two reasons cost and fit. Wetsuits have some fairly serious sticker shock. The other more important issue was my belief that wetsuit manufacturers probably did not make a wetsuit I could actually wear. Frankly athletic clothing makers never foresaw something my size trying to swim, bike or run. I’m a big guy running typically about 10 pounds beyond the specs for most of the larger size wetsuits. Also I’m proportioned a bit differently than most of the other endurance sports children: chubby, long waist, short legs and big calves that run about 18 inches in circumference with gusts to 18.5 depending on how much I run.
As usual I was forced through yet another triathlon doorway when I signed up for an April clinic that had several open water swims scheduled. Given the early Spring water temperatures in East TN, options included: hypothermia, wetsuit or kayak. Since I don’t own a kayak, my choices boiled down to beg, borrow, rent or buy a wetsuit or stand on the shore watching. Clearly it was time to gather some some courage, information and neoprene.
I started my search by calling my local swim/triathlon store a mere 90 minutes away in Knoxville. It turns out that they didn’t have anything in my size right now. Understandable as noted above most triathletes are considerably less fluffy than me. Next I turned to my local triathlon clubs. I’m lucky to have two strong groups with Facebook pages within driving distance. Posts to both groups got me several leads which I ran down in my usual less than systematic manner.
My big break came when one of my tri brothers in nearby Morristown invited me over to try on his two-piece DeSoto wetsuit in size 7. Thanks Dave. (Note DeSoto and Orca sizes are different. The largest DeSoto is a 7, and the largest Orca is an 11.) He gave me a good introduction to putting on a wetsuit. I was shocked and amazed to learn that you can put a hole in a triathlon wetsuit if you are not careful with your fingernails. He showed me the plastic grocery bag method for getting your hands and feet into the suit. You put you foot in the bag and slide it through the leg of the wetsuit. Remove bag put on other foot repeat. Works with hands too. If it is a one-piece wetsuit you carefully pull the suit up to your waist until your voice changes. I don’t know what metric the women use, and I’m probably better off not knowing.
Now comes the fun part. Breathe out and pull your shoulder blades back and together. (If you can actually clap with your shoulder blades this will be easy, otherwise not so much.) And have someone zip up the back of the suit. The DeSoto pullover/bibjohn two-piece suits zip down. Most one-piece suits zip up. Really important info: zipper goes in back. Now move your arms in a swimming motion and carefully work the sleeves up toward the shoulders until you have a good range of motion going. Take your time and get it right. You don’t want to feel like your in a bind once you hit the water and start swimming.
Before he got his Desoto wetsuit Dave had rented an Orca S4 from www.triwetsuitrentals.com and recommended them highly. So I sent them an e-mail via their website. The owner called me back same day and listened to my long list of physical deformities and reassured me that a Orca S4 in size 11 would indeed contain my massive bulk. One Paypal transaction later and the wetsuit was winging its way to me via Fedex.
It arrived a couple days later and I was so impressed with the company that I actually read the enclosed directions and followed them. Let’s just keep that between ourselves. I have very little street cred as it is. If it gets out that I can or will on occasion follow directions; well, let’s not go there.
I did indeed get the wetsuit on with some help from plastic grocery bags, baby powder and an assistant to zip it up. Since the wetsuit was black and technically a compression garment, I was hoping that it would be shall we say “slimming.” The end result was more walrus than Navy SEAL. Still having succeeded in actually donning the wetsuit it was time for a test drive. Time to find out why everyone is so “I just hope the race will be wetsuit legal.”
What was my first swim in a wetsuit like? Imagine that your mutant superpower was buoyancy. Your legs just float. Let me say that again, your legs just float. Vigorous kick, weak kick, intermittent kick: it doesn’t matter. Your legs float. You float. Swimming was noticeably easier. Treading water was amazing. I usually struggle to keep my head above water with my nose is always perilously close to the water’s surface. In the wetsuit, my whole head and neck are out of the water almost effortlessly.
Bottom line: 1). It is very likely that there is a wetsuit out there for you. You may have to shop around, reach out to your tri family, and rent one first. 2). You want one. Performance wise, wetsuits completely rock. Now if you will excuse me, I’m off to the internet to stalk a DeSoto Speedtube.
Links:
http://www.orca.com/category/wetsuits
How to put on an Orca wetsuit
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sFOaWyONw2I
How to put on a Desoto wetsuit